nach Hanover.

I'm going to Hanover for a conference tomorrow. Thursday afternoon I'll get to wander around with the camera. Pictures will be posted soon.

Um Jena.

So we took a little walk around Jena with the camera today. We started here at our home in Jena Ost.

We moved in here on the first of the month. The first four full sized windows on the lowest level are ours. The apartment is not large but big enough for the two of us. Currently, we have a roommate. We only pay half rent this month but we don't have the full space. From here, we caught the tram. It's across the river Saale to get to the fourth stop: StadtZentrum (city center). This was the goal of our trip. From anywhere in Jena, one can see the Jena tower:

Jena Tower was built when this was all East Germany. It's not entirely ugly, but definitive of the time and place. It does make me wonder if the Communists were trying to say, "you see, we have sky-scrapers here too." To the right of this view, there is a great showcase of older European buildings:
On the left, you can see a tower that at one time served as the main entrance to the city. A wall surrounded the city and outside of that, a moat. There are just a few remnants of the old fortifications (to be seen later). First, we wanted to have lunch, so we walked past Jena tower and the surrounding mall to find our way to Wagnerstrasse:

Wagnerstrasse still resembles it's premodern self as a narrow street made of brick. The pattern of the brick street resembles that in the Imperial City in Oblivion. Anyhow, these days it is lined with restaurants and bars. This is where we had lunch. You find the wierdest thing if you turn back towards Jena tower on this end of Wagnerstrasse.

Yes, that bar is called Cheers. They serve hamburgers with french fries, BBQ, chicken wings and everything else you expect in an American sports bar. My wife and I ate there once. We each had a burger. At first, it tasted good because we hadn't had anything American in a few weeks. After the third bite, however, we realized these were the worst burgers on the face of the Earth. Mine sat in my stomach like a lead brick. Moving away from Jena Tower, along Wagnerstrasse, you get more romantic views.

It's a pretty street. You can see a hill in the background. One thing I've learned about Jena is that it seems there isn't any crime. People don't seem to steal things and so stuff is often left just sitting in the most convenient place. The only exception I have heard of is bicycles. The one on the right is, in fact, chained up. Going further up Wagnerstrasse, on the right, there is a church, Baptist I think.
As we looked around, we also found this view.
Taking a better look at this tower, we discovered the tower for a whole other church.

This other church was in a cemetery and thus I didn't want to take pictures where people might not want me to. Instead, I did get this better shot of the church tower.
I almost forgot. In the same little area was this gorgeous old house. I presume this is where the pastor lives.

From here, we turned back along another road towards town. I got this shot at another part of the old city wall.

I decided to get some better views of the remnants of the city wall. Here is the same tower viewed from the opposite side.
In the other direction, you can see the main city entrance again.

This area is pretty open and my wife took a picture of this great statue/fountain.

We still wanted to end this journey taking a look at the old Catholic church, Friedrich-Schiller University and the market square. You head directly east to see the old Catholic church.

Along the way, there was interesting German art.

We finally did get to the church. Here is another view of it's clock-tower.

I liked this view of the church.

I also liked this one.
Past the church, you can see the university.
Notice it too, has a clock tower. There are multiple options on getting to the market square. We could have chosen to go past this pretty building.

Instead, we chose a cosier route.
Once in the market, it is impossible to miss the old Rathaus (city hall).

Not to mention it's clock tower.

We also noticed this pidgeon in the market square.

My wife claims she wanted a picture of the fountain here, but I think she just likes the birds.

The other side of the market square gives a good view of some of the architecture.

If you haven't noticed yet, I like taking pictures of towers.

Being done at the market, we started to head back home. I couldn't help though taking another picture of the city.

Ok, two.

We finally got home to enjoy the little yard our building has in the back.

I think that seems like a nice place to enjoy a beer now.

Learning to love German beer.

I don't know how to talk about being in Germany. Generally, you take a trip somewhere and you spend your time seeing the sights. Well, we moved here and we've spent most of the time figuring out how to survive in another country. It's not that hard really. Primarily, there is the communication problem. I've heard that Germans speak a good deal of English but my experience here has shown that the English is often very limited - granted better than my German.

We've done well on the basics. We got an apartment. We got a bank account. We have a bed and some minimal furniture. We even own a washing machine now. We know how to get monthly trian and bus passes and we generally know our way around the city. We even have some basic kitchen stuff: plates, pots, pans, glasses, sliverware, etc.

The frustrating parts are often the simplest. You see, when you live in the same place for a long time, there are a large set of tasks that you take your knowledge of them for granted. Somethings don't change no matter where you go. I know how to tie my shoes and that doesn't change in Germany. Somethings are different - like reading a bus schedule. The thing is, almost every twelve-year-old in Jena knows how to read the bus schedule. Yet still, just last week I found myself asking a German what was meant by the schedule.

There are plenty more examples like this but I don't want to bore you with that. What stands out to me though, is that here in Germany, in many ways, my experience is equal or less than that of a child. This is what clearly marks me different than others here. I simply do not have the set of experiences common to every human being who has grown up here. It is fortunate then that the people I have met are so understanding with me.

There is, for me, one place where I feel differently - at work. At the TPI (Theoretical Physics Institute) I am in my element. Not so long ago, I would be comfortable in all the situations I faced whether it be work, social or anything else. Now, the only setting in which I am generally competent is at work. At work, I find myself regularly noticing patterns that many do not and I get new ideas at a good pace. My co-workers recognize it and appreciate my input. Further, my degree and position give me credibility and respect. I have the ability to bring special attention to a student's project or provide a place to those less certain than I. For me, my work is a refuge from all the differences that I experience everywhere else.

My wife has to deal with the differences and doesn't have a job where she can apply her talents currently. This must be more difficult. She's been filling her time with domestic tasks but I can already tell she's tired of having little to do. It's fortunate that she has two interviews for PhD positions this month. I think if she has a job, it will not only give her things to do in the day but also provide her own community to operate in rather than being dependent on those I meet at my job.

Since we're feeling so settled in today, and since there is nothing else to do on a Sunday (everything is closed), we'll be wandering around town taking pictures. There are some pretty parts: the market square, two very old churches, some of the neihborhoods. See you then.

Take that, topic police!

Ignore the title.

The weather lately has been pretty warm. Actually, it's kind of surprising. I move to the northern half of a country which the entirety of is in a higher latitude than the 48 and most days have gotten into the high 80s. I guess it gets warm everywhere.

I wonder at times what portion of the local population I see. Jena is a small city of about a hundred thousand. It's also pretty dense (though perhaps not dense for Europe). Most of my waking hours I spend in the center of the city or at the institute which is just a little north of the center of town and kind of in a residential area. Still, after a couple of weeks, I feel like I am seeing the same set of people all the time now. Now I am not just talking about the people I have met, but even the people I see just around town.

With any city, I think there is a certain crowd that is often around the restaurants and bars and so forth. In Winston-Salem I ran into the same crowd all the time and there was a level of interaction that was above stranger but below friends that generally existed. For instance, I knew a few people at my favorite bar and they knew others and if I came in on a week-night around 8pm or so, I'd likely be able to strike up a conversation with someone or catch a game of pool. About a third of the time, I'd run into friends that I hung out with a lot.

At certain businesses, I really got to know the owners and employees. At City Beverage, the local beer enthusiast store, I knew the owner, his son (and business partner) and their one regular employee Dave. When we moved away, Dave gave both my wife and I hugs goodbye.

Language can become a severe barrier. I don't really speak German and I this will really get in the way of getting to know the community I am a part of. I want to learn German while I am here but even three years won't be enough to learn the language and get to have the kinds of relationships I am used to.

Two weeks is not a lot of time for reflection but I have some thoughts so far. Coming here has made me appreciate aspects of both German and American society. I guess I should be more specific. I have learned a new appreciation of aspects of Winston-Salem and of Jena. Saying American or German society covers a lot of ground.

Anyhow, I hope everyone is doing alright. Talk later.

Done,

Done and done.

I can't help.

I am sitting here at my computer. My wife is laying on the bed nearby watching tv. I think she's watching Sex in the City. Today, I turned in my PhD dissertation to my committee. I gotta admit, I'm a bit nervous. Tomorrow, my wife defends her master's thesis. We're both under noticeable stress. For all the stress, however, it seems to hold no water after my experience tonight.

I went out to have a beer to give my wife space. You know, I have a hard life . While out, I saw met this guy who had just been laid off. He must have been over fifty. I got the impression he was the sole bread earner in his family. It was all he could do to hold back his tears. I don't believe he is in as much trouble as he thinks, but right now must be the hardest time in his life. He's trying to explain to his wife, not knowing what tomorrow holds and wondering what he'll do in the future.

I wanted more than anything to be able to give this man a job. I obviously can't, but seeing him in his state, I couldn't help but want to be helpful. It's been easy for me to speak eloquently so far about how the economy will get better and that we're going through a needed adjustment. Me and my own, we've been fine - relatively. While I won't claim we aren't affected by the economy, my crowd tends to be doing well in good times or bad. I've been... ...safe from it all. Heck, I even got likely the best job I could hope for coming out of graduate school during the worst economic times of my own or my parents' lives.

It's another thing, though, to see the face of those who've lost their means in this economy. It brings it home. It makes me wonder what could be done. I had no answers for this man. All I could say is keep your chin up and fervantly work towards finding something new. It was a hallow response. It was a douchebag response. I could offer no comfort. The only meaningful thought I have is, this too shall pass.

Have you seen the effects of this recession? Has it been felt personally? Have you been laid off? How do you deal with it? Could you imagine any words of comfort? I know I am at a loss for words. Perhaps you have words that I should learn to understand.

I am scared.

Once I was held up at gunpoint in New Orleans. Somehow, I simply gave the guy my wallet and managed to walk away. In Egypt, I was kidnapped and only released once I gave my money over. While these were trying moments for me, they do not compare to what I am willing facing in the near future.

On the thirtieth of June, 2009 at 3 pm, I will defend my dissetation against a committee of people who all are far smarter than I am. For the very first time in my life, I am scared. Failure alone does not scare me. For the longest time, I never worried about anything. Failure was not a problem.

For the first time in my life, I really did everything I could. I've given everything I could to this work. My thesis represents the very best of who I am. In a week and four days, I show the best that I could ever do. On Tuesday, the thirtieth of June, at 3 pm of 2009, I present and defend my thesis. Six years of my life has gone into this moment. I have made my life about it. I have sacrificed good jobs, a life most would kill for and often my own pride for this moment.

In 2003, with a degree in physics and computer science, I would have had the world in front of me. It would have been easy. Today, I face the worst economy in any of our lifetimes and my only fear is going in front of this commitee. This group is made of my friends. I have played dungeons and dragons with one member. I have spent hours with the others. My own advisor, I have given him beers he didn't know were possible. These all hold no water. I trust these people to give me no ground for these things. I would not ask a single one of them, all five dear friends to me, to give me any slack in what I am about to face.

These are the smartest people I have ever met. I want desperately to stand amongst them. I want desperately for them to give me the recognition of those who understand the difficult path I have faced. This is one of the only two things I ever wanted.

I wanted my wife to marry me. I wanted to know we would forever be together. In this I had certainty. The other thing I want, is to be allowed into the ranks of the academic - not just aiming for it, but accepted into it. I know, for me, this is pure irony. I am the iconoclast. I strive against the normal. Yet it is still what I desire. I desire to be so recognized. It is for me the proof of my professional quality. I want the title. I want to be allowed to be called doctor.

This goal is the second most important thing in my life. The first is my wife. I know absolutely that I am the luckiest man on the face of the Earth to have my wife, who will stand beside me no matter what happens. Still, I can only think of fulfilling this goal I have set for myself.

I only hope I can live up to the expectation I have set for myself.